It’s a matter of pride, let’s ‘BUY’ a bride!

A very common belief which nearly every Indian family shares is that they want their clan to flourish. Becoming prosperous in wealth is a secondary thing. The primary credence is to prosper in NUMBER! Don’t raise those eyebrows because I’m not giving an opinion. I’m stating a fact. And this isn’t any old school notion. Today, too, it is the most common prayer you can hear in the temples – “Hey bhagwan! Humara vansh aise hi badhta rahe.” ( Oh lord! May our clan flourish/increase in number.) Well, I appreciate their efforts in contributing towards India’s growing population but my motive here is not to promote ‘Hum do, humare do’ movement. There is something serious which prickles me.

On Sunday, the remark of a BJP leader Mr. OP Dhankar, created a buzz in the media. He allegedly said that his party would get girls from Bihar to ensure that men in Haryana do not remain bachelors. I know, I know. Another political stunt! But what left me scratching my head was the thought that why will a conservative and orthodox community like Haryanvis will agree to marry their sons to Bihari girls? I am also a Haryanvi, so I know the implications of inter-caste marriage. Why will anyone deliberately allow such a thing to happen? And then it struck me. SKEWED SEX RATIO! Not only this. Another major reason is that people focus on reproducing baby boys. The more in number, the better. Then they lack sufficient amount of money to raise funds for their education. As a result, the poor baby boys remain uneducated and unmarried, because no independent, educated and liberal woman will marry a useless guy. This reminds  me of a famous dialogue my coaching institute’s math sir frequently said to taunt the guys who didn’t study. He had a Bihari accent. So without altering his refrain – “Aye larko! Parh lo. Warna saadi nahi hoga.” (Hey boys. Please study. Otherwise you won’t get married.) So true! But who has to be blamed for this declining sex-ratio and uneducated bunch of men? Well, the answer is self-evident.

Haryana has witnessed many cases of brides being bought from Bihar and other states for marrying more than one person. This practice has been prevalent in many parts of the state with involvement of middlemen and consent of family elders. Brides are bought and sold for various reasons which include the fulfillment of sexual desire and getting a family heir. Such women are often subjected to torture too. I mean what sort of animals these people are? They ‘buy’ women (mostly minors) for a cost ranging from Rs. 30,000 to Rs. 50,000, achieve their purpose and ill treat them. In the first place, human trafficking is a crime. Adding more to it, they abuse them also. Such shame! Wake up people. Okay, I get it that you genuinely need a bride for your son because it is a matter with your pride at stake. But why ‘buy’ her? Why can’t you arrange a proper mechanism where you approach her through a proper channel and get your son married? This will not only save you from committing a blunder but will also ensure that the new bride enjoys her share of dignity.

Now returning to the news-making politician, it is clear that he is trivializing the issue for the vote bank, while the real problem is immense and needs urgent attention. While efforts should be made to tide over the situation, political leaders seem to be more interested in scoring points rather than solving the problem. Lekin ye hi toh India hai. Until and unless a huge scam is created, will the politicians bother to make a move? The answer is ‘NO’ as always. But all we can do is hope because umeed pe duniya kayam hai. *chuckles*





5 thoughts on “It’s a matter of pride, let’s ‘BUY’ a bride!

  1. Yes! You’re talking about buying brides. In some parts of India, selling of grooms is the practice.

    If their son is a doctor or CA, dowry of 50 lacs. If he is an engineer 30 lacs of dowry. If he is a graduate, 10 lacs of dowry.

    Dont they even feel ashamed of selling their own sons like this!!

    Nice post!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey Mamta,

    Long time I haven’t heard from you and when I check out I missed this post. To be honest, Haryana, UP, Bihar and Delhi has to improve a lot. A lot. It’s so sad to see such a scenario.

    Anyways, hope to see you soon here.



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